I was just about to write a comment on a my friend’s blog, and give her the link to my friendship assignment when I realized huh, it’s not online. This was my very first assignment in LTS, and one that really helped alot through that year, and even now. I still remember when Charlie Fordham was introducing – not that I had to much expectations, cause everything up until that point at Capernwray, in life, etc, has been kind of unexpected. But his explanation really caught me off guard, well it really surprised me. But, and here’s the big but – the one I keep repeating to my friends over and over… it’s so. Biblical. Or I should say, it’s so clear, Biblically. Well, meh, here it is.

Friendship Assignment
By Chris Evangelista
October 25, 2004

What is a friend? You may be surprised. Friendship in God’s eyes is not what it is to man. To some, friends could be as lowly as mere acquaintances. To others, they are closer than family. To God, they are servants. In John 15:14, Jesus says to His disciples, “You are my friends if you obey My commandments.” What does this mean? Read on and find out.

According to God, being a true friend only has one meaning. Friendship involves sacrifice and love. It is a choice being made: a preference for another. In John 15:14, Jesus makes a very simple statement about what being a friend to Him means. He says, “You are my friends if you obey My commandments”; Our friendship with Jesus depends on our obedience to Him. And as we will see, our obedience to Him is dependent on our sacrifice for Him. There already is no question as to whether Jesus is a friend to us or not. He died on the cross for us. The question is, are we a friend to Him? This then dictates our friendship with others. If friendship to Jesus means preferring Him, then friendship to others mean preferring them.

In John 15:12. we see the basis of friendship to others in Jesus’ command to His disciples: “This is My commandment that you love one another, just as I have loved you.” We see that the basis for our interaction with each other is loving one another. We then also see that there is a reference point for our love of each other, and that is just as Jesus loved us. This is amplified in the next verse, showing the kind of love Jesus expects from us as it was the kind of love He had. Verse 13 says, “Greater love has no one than this, that one lay down his life for his friends.” The love that we should have for each other is sacrificial. This is what determines if we are a friend to someone, that we are sacrificing ourselves for them.

This is solidified in the next verse, verse 14: “You are my friends if you obey My commandments,” as is juxtaposed with John 14:15, which says, “If you love Me, you will keep My commandments.” These verses show the key requirement of being a friend to God: love that leads to sacrifice, that leads to obedience. Friendship is governed by love.

We see more of what this love is about in 1 John 4:7-8. It says, “Beloved, let us love one another for love is from God; and everyone who loves is born of God and knows God. The one who does not love does not know God for God is love.” This passage shows us what – or who, should be the source of our sacrificial love: God. It says that He is the One who provides love, but not only this, it also says that He is the very love that we should have. How we attain this love is talked about in the next verse: “By this, the love of God was manifested in us, that God has sent His only begotten Son into the world so that we might live through Him” (1 John 4:9). It states that the way that God’s love is made visible in us is by living in faith through Christ. This is where we reach the cost of having sacrificial love.

Through Christ is also where we see the cost of being a friend to someone. Jesus said in John 12:24 that “unless a grain of wheat falls into the earth and dies, it remains alone; but if it dies, it bears much fruit.” The death He is alluding to in this may not necessarily mean physical death. In 1 Corinthians, Paul talks about this when he writes, “I affirm brethren, by the boasting in you which I have in Christ Jesus our Lord, I die daily” (1 Corinthians 15:31). We see here that what really should happen in our sacrificial love is that we would die daily to ourselves – to who we are and want to be; or what we do, and want to do. This is how Jesus tells us to love each other in John 15:12, just as He had loved us. It did not mean His love for us when He went to the cross (because He had not gone to the cross yet when He said that), but so much more! How Christ loved us is by dying to who He rightfully is. What this meant for Him, as it says in Philippians is that “although He existed in the form of God, [He] did not regard equality with God a thing to be grasped, but emptied Himself, taking the form of a bond-servant, and being made in the likeness of men” (Philippians 2:6,7). Jesus’ death and suffering on the cross was a result of this, for “He humbled Himself by becoming obedient to the point of death, even death on a cross” (Philippians 2:8). The sacrificial love that we are supposed to have is also the cost of having it. It means that we would die to ourselves so that in humility, we would serve our friends. Friendship is a sacrifice in life, evidenced by servitude.

Excel Still More is an expression that has a lot of meaning in my life…

During my two years at Capernwray Harbour Bible Centre, I really felt God moving in my life, transforming me into what He wants me to be. The message at Capernwray was simple – and that is to consider Jesus in all aspects of my life.

At the end of both years – in fact, I believe they do this at the end of every year, the last books of the Bible that are taught are 1st and 2nd Thessalonians, which is where the expression comes from…Finally then, brethren, we request and exhort you in the Lord Jesus, that as you received from us instruction as to how you ought to walk and please God (just as you actually do walk), that you excel still more. 1 Thessalonians 4:1.

To me, the phrase is really fitting in the Christian Life as we realize that God is continually at work in our lives. And to excel still more does not have anything to do with what we can do ourselves – for excelence in the Christian lives is measured by how much Christ shows in your life. So “Excel Still More” is this, that we continue to lay all of who we are at the feet of Jesus Christ, that He may do His work in our lives…

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To start off, my name is Chris Bundoc Evangelista. I was born on October 26, 1985 in Manila, Philippines to Joselito and Stella Evangelista. I am Filipino by heritage, yet I am Canadian in citizenship – I have been living in Toronto, Canada since 1995, with my parents and my brother, James.

I am a flower quickly fading,
Here today and gone tomorrow,
A wave tossed in the ocean,
A vapor in the wind.
Still you hear me when I’m calling,
Lord, you catch me when I’m falling,
And you’ve told me who I am.
I am yours.
- Casting Crown

The most defining characteristic about me is what some would call “religion”. You see, I am a Christian. Although I don’t think of Christianity as religion. To me, it is a relationship. Initianted by God through my Lord and Saviour, Jesus Christ. Because of this relationship, I am a redeemed Child of God. And because I am a redeemed Child of God, I am a witness to this Gospel – to this Good News. It is my Vocation (something continuous, as opposed to my occupation, which could change year to year).

On that note, my occupation is as a Student at University of Toronto, enrolled with Woodsworth College. I am working towards an Honours Bachelor of Arts, double majoring in Political Science and History. In completing these programs, I plan to focus on International Governance or International Criminal Law. It is my goal to use this degree to pursue a career in either Foreign Service, or in International Organizations. My dream is to find a career in which I travel alot, while I use my interest in Politics.

I attend Morningstar Christian Fellowship where I play the piano for various music ministry teams. I love to read, so I do it alot, especially when there is a really good book out by my favourite authors, WEB Griffin or John Grisham. I am also on the computer alot – I can program in Visual Basic and Java. But I’m am by no means an expert. Like most things that I do, I only program for fun. Eventually, I want to earn my pilots license as well, and to take up target shooting or hunting.

I created this blog a few years ago as a kind of online journal thing. Somewhere I can vent sometimes… I can put what’s going on, etc etc. In August 2005, I went a step further and purchased the ichthus.ca dommain name, which is when I started to really take this seriously. I have some different things I’d like to do for the domain, but this is good for now.

honours, diplomas and certificates

• St. John’s Ambulance Emergency First Aid w/CPR ‘C’, January 1997
• Ontario Elementary School Certificate, June 1999
• Valedicatorian Award, June 1999
• Computer Award, June 1999
• Red Cross Emergency First Aid w/CPR ‘C’, January 2002
• 2nd Place OEBA Computer Programming Contest, May 2003
• Ontario High School Diploma (OHSD), June 2003
• Ontario Scholar Award, June 2003
• Music Department Award, June 2003
• Lieutenant Governor’s Volunteer Service Award, June 2003
• 1-Year Bible Program Certificate, May 2004
• Red Cross Standard First Aid w/CPR ‘C’, May 2004
• Leadership Training Program Certificate, May 2005
• Smart Serve Certificate, April 2007

education

Pre-School – Kindergarten / 1987 – 1992

The Learning Tree; Rizal, Philippines

Kindergarten – Grade 2 / 1992 – 1995

University of the Philippines Integrated School; Diliman, Philippines

Grade 4 – Grade 6 / 1995 – 1997

Heron Park Junior Public School; Scarborough, Ontario

Grade 7 – Grade 8 / 1997 – 1999

Joseph Brant Senior Public School; Scarborough, Ontario

Grade 9 – Grade 12 / 1999 – 2003

http://satec.on.ca/; Scarborough, Ontario

1 Year Bible Program & Leadership Training Program / 2003 – 2005

Capernwray Harbour Bible Centre; Thetis Island, British Columbia

Honours Bachelor of Arts, Majors in Political Science and History / 2005 – Present

University of Toronto, Woodsworth, College; Toronto, Ontario

work experience

Law Clerk/Receptionist

Sharma and Sharma Law Firm, January 2002 – June 2002 (Co-op Program)

Customer Service Representative

Famous Players Cinema, October 2002 – January 2003

Camp Leader (Music Instructor)

Toronto Parks, Forestry and Recreation (Mowat Arts Adventure), Summer 2002

Camp Leader

Toronto Parks, Forestry and Recreation (West Hill FITS), Summer 2003

Camp Coordinator

Toronto Parks, Forestry and Recreation (David Lewis FITS), Summers 2004 & 2005

Customer Service Representative

Old Navy, September 2005 – May 2006

Camp Coordinator

Toronto Parks, Forestry and Recreation (Laurier Explore the Arts Camp), Summer 2006

Auxilary Staff (Assistant Manager / Program Staff)

Toronto Parks, Forestry and Recreation (Central Region, East District & South District), 2002 – 2006

Student Caller

University of Toronto Telefund, September 2006 – December 2006

Piano Teacher

Morningstar Christian Fellowship: School of Music, September 2006 – Present

Check-In Supervisor / English Tutor

TEC Services Inc., September 2006 – Present

Bartender

Cruise Toronto / Obsession III, May 2007 – Present

volunteer and ministry experience

Sunday School Teacher (Kindergarten – Grade 2)

Scarborough Centre Alliance Church, 1999 – 2001

Team Member

Urban Promise Missions Trip to Camden, June 2001

Sunday School Teacher (Grade 3 – Grade 5)

Scarborough Centre Alliance Church, 2001 – 2002

Team Member

World Vision Missions Trip to Guatemala City, 2001 – 2002

Band Leader / Piano

Transfusion/Oasis Youth Worship Band, 2002-2003

Team Leader / Piano

St. Michael Anglican Church Ministry Team, 2003-2004

Piano

Version 6:23 Band, 2002 – 2004

Piano

Music Ministry Team of Capernwray Harbour Bible Centre, 2004-2005

Piano

Morningstar Christian Fellowship Orchestra, 2006 – Present

Sunday School Teacher (Preschool – Kindergarten)

Morningstar Christian Fellowship “Trec”, 2005 – Present

Study Group Leader

“Truly God is First” Bible Study Group, 2002 – Present

“The Reason Why” is an essay I wrote during my LTS (Leadership Training Student) year at Capernwray Harbour Bible Centre. It began as a small assignment – what we call a journal – for the book of Romans. We were asked to write a kind of summary for every chapter in the book in the form of a letter to a friend, explaining why it is that we believe in the Gospel of Jesus Christ.

Well, what started out as this short essay turned into quite a big one. I wasn’t even able to hand it in when it was due, right before our Christmas Break. I brought it home with me, and worked on it throughout my vacation, right up until the day I was travelling back to School. I still remember that day quite clearly, actually. I was on a “milk run” flight back to Vancouver from Toronto. The flight stopped in Winnipeg, Saskatoon, Edmonton, and finally in Vancouver. And every stop I made, I would take out my laptop and write just a little bit more. Before you know it, I was at 3200 words.

I am a Christian. A follower of Jesus Christ. I guess you can describe me as devout. I say it is just what is normal in my life. If this is something you are wondering about – if you had any questions about some of the things I write in my blog – perhaps this is the place to find the answer. I know this essay is quite long, and is at times a little repetative. But if I repeat anything, I only do so because it is just so important. If you really must, I suggest reading the abbreviated version – that is, reading the introduction, and skipping to the last paragraph.

This isn’t exactly an evangelistic essay either. Although technically, everything I do as a Christian should be evangelistic. In fact, this essay has a lot of points that Christians should pay close attention to. I should know. The very reason why I wrote it – the very reason for the assignment – was to remind myself of what God had been teaching me. But nonetheless, the Gospel message to both Christians and Non-Christians is the same: that is Jesus. It is only He that I seek to proclaim back when I wrote it, and now as I share it.

If you have any question about what is written in this essay, or about starting this relationship with Jesus Christ, please don’t hesitate at all to email me at chris@ichthus.ca. May the Lord bless you, and open your heart as you read on.

Romans – The Reason Why
Lecturers: Charlie Fordham and Lawrence Jensen
By Chris Evangelista, January 2005

These are the reasons why I believe in Jesus Christ. God’s truth is evident. He is beyond empirical evidence; He is beyond theory. He reveals Himself so clearly that there is no excuse not to believe: “For since the creation of the world His invisible attributes, His eternal power and divine nature, have been clearly seen, being understood through what has been made, so that they are without excuse” (Romans 1:20). But man chooses to suppress His truth, which in itself is evidence that God has revealed His truth, because for truth to be suppressed, then truth should have first been revealed. This suppression leads man to become “futile in their speculations, and their foolish hearts [were] darkened” (Romans 1:21). They can then only guess who God is, which even their guessing is useless in itself.

Most Christians would like to believe that this is only true of the non-believers. But it is very clearly seen even in us; we, the children of God, have chosen this path for ourselves. We are, to ourselves, the “guide to the blind, a light to those who are in darkness, a corrector of the foolish, [and the] teacher of the immature” (Romans 2:19, 20), but we ourselves are condemned by the message that we teach because we are “transgressors of the Law,” which causes our “circumcision to be un-circumcision” (Romans 2:26). We are no different from the non-believers. We need Christ just as much now as we ever have needed Him before. Because of our ignorance, and because of our hypocrisy, the life that Christ has put in us, we have turned to death. As much as we’d like to think otherwise, we do have things in our lives like the Mosaic Law of the Israelites, that we put our trust and faith in, despite Jesus: Spiritual Retreats, Powerful Speakers, Reading the Bible. Yes, those are all sin, if our Christianity is dependent on them! What is required for our continuing salvation is the circumcision of the flesh from our lives done by the Spirit’s intervention in our hearts rather than our obedience to the Law.

No one in the world will ever be found righteous in and of themselves. Paul quotes Psalm 14, which says that “there is none righteous, not even one; there is none who understands, there is none who seeks for God; all have turned aside, together they have become useless” (verse 11, 12). By this, he means that no one can perform the works of the Law and can be found righteous, for through the Law, sin is revealed. But rather the righteousness of the Law, which is revealed in the Law and in the Prophets, is equal to that of the righteousness found in faith in Jesus Christ, for that is the righteousness of God. In this then, boasting is eliminated so that the basis for our salvation remains God’s mercy on us and not anything that we have done: “Then what becomes of our pride and our boasting? It is excluded (banished, ruled out entirely). On what principle? On the principle of doing good deeds? No, but on the principle of faith. For we hold that a man is justified and made upright by faith independent of and distinctly apart from good deeds (works of the Law). The observance of the Law has nothing to do with justification.” (Romans 3:27, 28). The justification is through faith in the “just and the justifier” (Romans 3:26). It is by His mercy and grace, granting us justification, then righteousness, rather than our works and self-righteousness.

This is proven by the righteousness found in Abraham even before the establishment of the Mosaic Law: “For if Abraham was justified by works, he has something to boast about, but not before God. For what does the Scripture say? ‘Abraham believed God, and it was credited to Him as Righteousness’” (Romans 4:2, 3). Paul explains that Abraham was credited with righteousness even before he was circumcised, and that he was only circumcised as a sign – a seal – of the righteousness he has already received through faith. He then says, “For this reason it is by faith, in order that it may be in accordance with grace, so that the promise will be guaranteed to all the descendants, not only to those who are of the Law, but also to those who are of the faith of Abraham, who is the father of us all” (verse 16). Our faith is what allows us to experience the grace that God gives by our justification. On the basis of faith, I get to enjoy grace, receiving what I do not deserve: forgiveness; in order not to receive what I do deserve: death.

Having been justified by faith in Christ, I am now able to have peace with God, “therefore, having been justified by faith, we have peace with God through our lord Jesus Christ” (Romans 5:1). But Peace with God is not how most people would define peace. Peace to the world usually means the absence of conflict, war or violence. But Peace with God is actually our acknowledgement of our deficiencies in light of His abilities. This is what grace is supposed to remind us of, that we have nothing in and of ourselves to please God. “For if while we were enemies we were reconciled, we shall be saved by His life. And not only this, but we also exult in God through our Lord Jesus Christ, through whom we have now received the reconciliation” (Romans 5:10, 11). It is God, in Christ alone, who does the work. He is the one who seeks us, and He is the one who saves us.

If then we are saved by God’s grace, the flesh – the sin nature in us – would then wonder that if God so freely gives His grace to us, then could we not continue sinning because we will be forgiven anyways? The question that Paul asks in Romans 6:1 goes even further, “Are we to continue in sin so that grace may increase?” Should we continue to sin even though we have been saved, just so God’s grace may increase even more? The answer is simply no, for “how shall we who died to sin still live in it?” (Romans 6:2). The process of receiving Christ’s full salvation involves the whole process of being united with Him in His death, so that we may also be united with Him in His life: “For if we have become united with Him in the likeness of His death, certainly we shall also be in the likeness of His resurrection, knowing this, that our old self was crucified with Him, in order that our body of sin might be done away with, so that we would no longer be slaves to sin; for he who has died is free from sin” (Romans 6:6, 7). The requirement of this is the consideration that we have died to sin and are alive only to God in Christ Jesus (Romans 6:11). This then means that sin no longer is master over us, and that we “do not go on presenting the members of [our] bodies to sin as instruments of unrighteousness; but present [ourselves] to God as those alive from the dead, and [our] members as instruments of righteousness to God” (Romans 6:13, 14).

Through this, we realize the continuing presence of sins right now in our earthly bodies, for while Jesus Christ has conquered the penalty of sin by reconciling us to God, the presence of sin will not be done away with until we are in our glorified bodies. What this results in, in our mortal bodies, is the struggle between the Flesh and the Spirit: “For what I am doing, I do not understand for I am not practicing what I would like to do, but I am doing the very thing I hate” (Romans 7:15). Paul realizes that He is not walking according to the power of Christ’s salvation in his life. But with this realization also comes the brokenness that we need to have in order for God to work through us, as Paul writes in Romans 7:24, “Wretched man that I am! Who will set me free from the body of this death?” Again we realize what we see in the previous passages, the acknowledgement of our deficiencies in light of God’s abilities. God’s ability to save us again clearly seen in Romans 8:1-4, “Therefore there is now no condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus. For the law of the Spirit of life in Christ Jesus has set me free from the law of sin and of death. For what the Law could not do, weak as it was through the flesh, God did: sending His own Son in the likeness of sinful flesh and as an offering for sin, He condemned sin in the flesh, so that the requirement of the Law might be fulfilled in us, who do not walk according to the flesh but according to the Spirit.” God is the one who redeems us; He is the one who took the steps necessary that we may continue to be saved from sin: its penalty, its power, and eventually its presence.

This again brings us to where our obligation lies which is not in the Flesh, but in the Spirit which is in Jesus Christ: “So then, brethren, we are under obligation, not to the flesh, to live according to the flesh- for if you are living according to the flesh, you must die but if by the Spirit you are putting to death the deeds of the body you will live” (Romans 8:12). There is only death to be found in the flesh, if not the effects of sin – eternal separation from God in the lake of fire, but the power of sin – continuing separation from God in everyday futility of our minds. It says in Romans 8:13, “For if you live according to [the dictates of] the flesh, you will surely die. But if through the power of the [Holy] Spirit you are [habitually] putting to death (making extinct, deadening) the [evil] deeds prompted by the body, you shall [really and genuinely] live forever.” There is no longer any obligation to the flesh, but only victory in faith in Jesus Christ, which is a total victory that can never be taken away: “For I am convinced that neither death, nor life, nor angels, nor principalities, nor things present, nor things to come, nor powers, nor height, nor depth, nor any other created thing, will be able to separate us from the love of God which is in Christ Jesus our Lord” (Romans 8:38, 39). Amen!

What prevents us from realizing Christ’s sufficiency is our pride and our arrogance. This is the kind of arrogance seen in Romans 9:20, “On the contrary who are you, O man, who answers back to God? The thing molded will not say to the molder, ‘Why did you make me like this,’ will it? Or does not the potter have a right over the clay, to make from the same lump one vessel for honourable use and another for common use?” This is the problem, when arrogance replaces faith. This is how the Israelites failed as well: “but Israel, pursuing a law of righteousness, did not arrive at that law. Why? Because they did not pursue it by faith, but as though it were by works. They stumbled over the stumbling stone” (Romans 9:31, 32). So too will we stumble over the truth of Christ if we do not receive it simply by faith, for only Faith in Christ brings salvation: “For not knowing about God’s righteousness and seeking to establish their own, they did not subject themselves to the righteousness of God. For Christ is the end of the law for righteousness to everyone who believes” (Romans 10:3, 4). This faith again is the realization that only God and His activity is the only one who can save us, “if you confess with your mouth Jesus as Lord, and believe in your heart that God raised Him from the dead, you will be saved” (Romans 10:9).

God is so faithful to believe in! And He continues to make it clear that He is the way to salvation, as it says in Romans 10:17-18, “Surely they have never heard, have they? Indeed they have: ‘Their voice has gone out into all the earth, and their words to the ends of the world.’” God is completely clear. We just need to pay attention, take heed, and to obey: “For God has shut up all in disobedience so that He may show mercy to all. Oh, the depth of the riches both of the wisdom and knowledge of God! How unsearchable are His judgements and unfathomable His ways! For who has known the mind of the Lord, or who became His counsellor? Or who has first given to Him that it might be paid back to Him again? For from Him and through Him and to Him are all things. To Him be the glory forever. Amen” (Romans 11:31-36). His evidence having been clearly examined and found true, we need to respond. Paul writes: “Therefore I urge you, brethren, by the mercies of God, to present your bodies a living and holy sacrifice, acceptable to God, which is your spiritual service of worship” (Romans 12:1).

Therefore, because from God and through God and to God are all things, the only response that we can have is worship. And this isn’t the worship that we are accustomed to: dim lighting, soft music, and hands lifted up while singing “Kumbayah my Lord.” The act of worship required in response to God’s revelation of who He is, is an act of sacrifice. We must surrender our lives to Him and remove ourselves from everything that we were before God. This is the only response that can be expected to God’s mercy and grace. But it not only that, it is also the only response that can lead to the satisfaction we desire, for that satisfaction is found only in being sanctified – in being used for our purpose, which is to be in His image: “And do not be conformed to this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind, so that you may prove what the will of God is that which is good and acceptable and perfect” (Romans 12:2).

This is the summation of the Christian Life. It is not merely God saving us from the penalty of our sin – eternal death, but God continually saving us from the power of sins, now, and transforming us back into His image. This transformation leads us to sanctification – our being used for our original purpose to glorify God, and sanctification leads us to love. It says in Romans 12:9, “Let love be without hypocrisy. Abhor what is evil; cling to what is good. Be devoted to one another in brotherly love; give preference to one another in honor; not lagging behind in diligence, fervent in spirit, serving the Lord; rejoicing in hope, persevering in tribulation, devoted to prayer, contributing to the needs of the saints, practicing hospitality.” This love also rejoices, and blesses rather than cursing (Romans 12:14). It does not pay back evil for evil, and at always attempts to be at peace with all men (Romans 12:17, 18). God in our lives leads us to an active love that the world would not be able to understand.

Our response to God also demands us to be subject to our governing authorities (Romans 13:1). This is in faith that “there is no authority except from God, and those which exist are established by God” (Romans 13:2). Our response also is to be an example of morality, and understanding that we should be living lives that are seen and can be examined by those around us: “The night is almost gone, and the day is near. Therefore let us lay aside the deeds of darkness and put on the armor of light. Let us behave properly as in the day, not in carousing and drunkenness, not in sexual promiscuity and sensuality, not in strife and jealousy” (Romans 13:12, 13). Our response to God should be something that people can see in our daily actions: “But put on the Lord Jesus Christ, and make no provision for the flesh in regard to its lusts” (Romans 13:14).

This response of love should also be seen in the way we treat other believers in Christ, and in the way we correct each other as we build each other up in faith: “So then each one of us will give an account of himself to God. Therefore let us not judge one another anymore, but rather determine this – not to put an obstacle or a stumbling block in a brother’s way” (Romans 14:12, 13). This is our call not to argue about simple things in our faith, for “nothing is unclean in itself; but to him who think anything to be unclean, to him it is unclean” (Romans 14:14). This is to say that we should not trample on each other’s beliefs and to reverse the work of Christ in arguments about things like denominational differences. “So then, we pursue the things which make for peace and the building up of one another. Do not tear down the work of God for the sake of food. All things indeed are clean, but they are evil for the man who eats and gives offence” (Romans 14:16).

This freedom should not be abused though, to the point that it is causing others to stumble: “now we who are strong ought to bear the weaknesses of those without strength and not just please ourselves… so that with one accord you may with one voice glorify the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ” (Romans 15:1… 6). We should strive for unity in the belief that Christ alone can do His work in us. We should be servants of each other and of our faith, so that we may continually fulfill His promise to us, for “Christ has become a servant to the circumcision on behalf of the truth of God to confirm the promises…” (Romans 15:8).

The reason why I believe in Jesus Christ is that He is faithful and true to everything that I am and hope to be. He loves me “warts and all”: despite my imperfections, despite my disobedience and despite my unfaithfulness. His grace and mercy abound far more than I could ever imagine. And the only way that I can respond to this is that I can’t. I can’t find salvation in myself. I can’t even be truly human by myself. It takes Him in me – his continuing work in me – for me to ever come close to His expectations. This was a mystery for so long. But now it’s revealed. It’s in me. It can be in you. Christ in us, the hope of Glory! Wow. Thank You, Jesus! “Now to Him who is able to establish you according to my gospel and the preaching of Jesus Christ, according to the revelation of the mystery which has been kept secret for long ages past, but now is manifested, and by the scriptures of the prophets, according to the commandment of the eternal God, has been made known to all the nations, leading to obedience of faith; to the only wise God, through Jesus Christ, be the glory forever. Amen.” (Romans 16:25-27).

The Worry Assignment was the first assignment in my LTS Year. We were suppsoed to look through the major divisions in the Bible to find what God had to say about worry. First there was the Law, the Wisdom Books, the Prophets, the Gospels, and then the Epistles. It is amazing how well connected these parts of the Bible are in showing the truth found in Jesus Christ!

Worry Assignment
Chris Evangelista
October 14, 2004

Worry, or anxiety, leads to fear. It is a fear that is concerned only for yourself. This worry can be “legitimately” caused by a lack of our basic necessities: food, shelter, clothing, or even a threat to our physical life. And it could also be a worry about the things that you say, think or do. But whatever it is about, this worrying leads to a loss of focus on God, who can provide all of our needs, and even abundantly more: “From the God of your father who helps you, and by [El-Shaddai, who is Almighty to provide], who blesses you with the blessings of heaven above” (Genesis 49:35). Worrying is in essence, disbelief; It is the lack of faith in God who is big enough to provide for our every circumstances. He is the provider of all! We should cast our anxieties (worries) on Him because He cares for us (1 Peter 5:7).

This worry and fear is seen all over the Scriptures. But at every instance of disbelief, God is quick to turn the focus back on Himself. In Exodus 13, after the Israelites have left Egypt, they found themselves in a desperate situation. On the run from Pharaoh, they come to a dead end, the Red Sea. With no way around, and with Pharaoh’s army closing in, Israel lost their focus and began to fear: “Is it because there were no graves in Egypt that you have taken us away to die in the wilderness? Why have you dealt with us this way, bringing us out of Egypt?” (Exodus 14:11). After God miraculously brought them out of Egypt, they were already longing to return. They have lost their faith; they lost their focus on God and would have rather gone back to serve the people they were fleeing from. They were thinking only of their well-being, and of preserving their lives. Because in anxiety, they saw only death, a dead end. But Moses trusted in Jehovah: “Do not fear! Stand by and see the Salvation of the Lord, which He will accomplish for you today” (Exodus 14:13). Then, God’s Salvation did come. He parted the Red Sea and the Israelites walked through on dry ground. That is the effect of faith: No fear, and God’s Activity.

The prophet Isaiah clearly states god’s instructions on fear and anxiety. Speaking to Israel about their deliverance, the Lord says to them: “Say to those with anxious hearts. ‘Take courage, fear not. Behold your God will come with a vengeance; the recompense of God will come, but He will save you’” (Isaiah 35:4). This is what God is telling us about our anxieties. To lay it aside, to have courage, and have faith. Then He gives us a reason to be courageous. Not because the anxiousness will pass, or because we can either ignore it, or do something about it. But rather because God will come, and not just come, but come with a vengeance.

This is seen in a similar way in the Gospels. In Matthew 6, Jesus is teaching His disciples on worrying. He uses a number of illustrations to show why they should not be worried about anything. He says in verse 25: “do not be worried about your life, as to what you will eat or what you will drink; nor for your body, as to what you will put on. Is not life more than food, and the body more than clothing?” He continues to talk about the birds who never go hungry because God feeds them. He says: “are you nto worth more than they?” (Matthew 6:26). In the same way, He talks about the grass that are adorned with lilies, which were more beautiful than Solomon’s garments, that God causes to grow. Again He says: “Will He not much more clothe you” (Matthew 6:30). And then finally, He states what really was wrong with them: “You of little faith!” It is their faith – or lack of it – that was causing their anxieties. They were worried for themselves and so, they lost sight of God. Jesus then instructs them on how to gain this focus back: “Do not worry then, saying, ‘What will we eat?’ or ‘what will we wear for clothing?’ For the gentiles eagerly seek all these things; for your heavenly Father knows that you need all these things. But seek first His kingdom and His righteousness, and all these things will be added to you” (Matthew 6:31-33). In essence, Jesus is repeating what Moses said in Exodus: “Do not fear! Stand by and see the salvation of Jehovah” (Exodus 14:13); and what Isaiah says in his prophecy: “Take courage, fear not. Behold your God will come” (Isaiah 35:4)/ He is telling them to turn their face back to God, to seek first His kingdom and His righteousness. And then, God will take care of the rest. He did it for Moses in Exodus. And He did it and is doing it in the person of Jesus Christ.

In the Psalms, we see the result of having faith in God during times of difficulty. In Psalm 94:19, we read, “when my anxious thoughts multiply within me, Your consolations delight my soul.” IN this, we see the focus on God carried out as He intended it to be in the midst of worry and anxiety. The Psalmist does not talk about a time before or after anxious thoughts multiply within him when God consoles him. What he says is that when – at the very moment – he has anxious thoughts multiplying within him, God consoles him. That is focus! That is faith. He has assurance of the consolation of God that delights his soul in that moment he needs it. “Now faith is the assurance of things hoped for, the conviction of things not seen” (Hebrews 11:1-2). The heart that has faith in God will have the hope and conviction that God will provide what is unseen: comfort in his restlessness.

In John’s first epistle, we learn more of the reason why we can have this hope, why we should not fear in worry or anxiety. First it starts out with a statement of God’s character:” God is love” (1 John 4:16). Then it goes on to how it is applied in fear, worry, and anxiety: “And the one who abides in love abides in God and God in him” (1 John 4:16). Already, that is comforting for an anxious heart. All that you have to do is abide in God, that is to keep Him in focus and have faith in Him, because He will also then abide in you. But there is still more. “By this, love is perfected with us, so that we may have confidence in the day of judgement; because as He is, so also are we in this world” (1 John 4:17). In God, we can have confidence, not anxiety, because we are becoming like Him. But we can only be like Him and have confidence if we abide in Him and He abides in us. Then finally, there is a reason why we may have confidence in the face of anxiety: because “there is no fear in love; but perfect love casts out fear” (1 John 4:18). This is the illustrations of the previous passages. In Exodus, it was God who provided Salvation; in Isaiah, it was God who will come (has come) with a vengeance; in Psalms, it was God who gave consolation; in Matthew, it was God who added all these things to you. And this all happened while there was anxiety in their heart, though even sometimes, there was no faith in God. This is all because Perfect Love – that is to say, our God – casts out fear. The warning is this, though, that “the one who fears is not perfected in love” (1 John 4:18). So this is the question when worry becomes apparent: “ should we worry and fear, resulting in imperfection? Or should we lay it all down at the feet of our God, and abide in Him who casts out fear?

“Therefore, humble yourselves under the mighty hand of God, that He may exalt you at the proper time, casting all your anxieties on Him, because He cares for you.” – 1 Peter 5:6-7.

The idea of a “verse-timony” – that is, a testimony made completely out of bible verses was first introduced to me when a student during my first year at Capernwray did… well yeah, just that. It was a Friday-morning testimony, and it was a student from Australia who had done it. I remeber being really amazed at what she had done. I still remember when she first went up to speak. Well, actually, she didn’t say anthing. She got up, opened her bible and read a verse. Then, she turned to another page and read that verse. She didn’t even give references. She just kept reading verse after verse, not really elaborating. She didn’t really need to, as I realized that the verse did make sense together. It told a story, just as other testimonies did. A story of God’s faithfulness. A story of God’s truth.

I didn’t really think too much about it at the time – except of course, as I said, being really amazed, and blessed by what she had done. It wasn’t until that summer, when myself and tGif (truly God is first, my bible study group) were doing a bible study (I believe it was taught by my brother) on testimonies, that I started thinking about it again. It was shortly after this that I found out that I was going to be returning to Capernwray for the next school year. And so, before I left, I posed a challenge to the guys. By the end of the school year, I’d like each of us to be able to give a testimony completely in bible verses.

I thought it was a really good exercise for us, looking and searching through the Word, trying to find the right verse to describe what we wanted to. Unfortunately, it turns out that no one had even worked on it – not even me, until I was reminded of it, just before I came home from my LTS year. It was in mid-April when I started working on it. Fortunately, I had been keeping verses that I thought were nice, that had really impacted me. I was typing them up in a text file, so it was really easy to just cut and paste the ones that I thought were relevant. Not to say that I didn’t search the Bible for more verses. I did.

Anyway, it turned out pretty well. I completed it before I came home to Toronto. But it wasn’t really until later that summer that I had a concise version of it. I have to say that the time I spent writing this were some of the best times I have had studying the Bible.

Verse-timony
Chris Evangelista
April 2005

I know your deeds, that you are neither cold nor hot; I wish that you were cold or hot. So because you are lukewarm, and neither hot nor cold, I will spit you out of My mouth. Because you say, “I am rich, and have become wealthy, and have need of nothing,” and you do not know that you are wretched and miserable and poor and blind and naked, I advise you to buy from Me gold refined by fire so that you may become rich, and white garments so that you may clothe yourself, and that the shame of your nakedness will not be revealed; and eye salve to anoint your eyes so that you may see. These whom I love, I reprove and discipline; therefore be zealous and repent. Behold, I stand at the door and knock; if anyone hears My voice and opens the door, I will come in to him and will dine with him and he with Me. He who overcomes, I will grant to him to sit down with Me on My throne, as I also overcame and sat down with My Father on His throne. (Revelation 3:15-21)

For thus the Lord God , the Holy One of Israel, has said, “In repentance and rest you will be saved, in quietness and trust is your strength.” But you were not willing. (Isaiah 30:15)

You have not yet resisted to the point of shedding blood in your striving against sin; and you have forgotten the exhortation which is addressed to you as sons, “my son, do not regard lightly the discipline of the Lord, nor faint when you are reproved by Him; for those whom the Lord loves He disciplines, and He scourges every son whom he receives.” It is for discipline that you endure, God deals with you as with sons; for what son is there whom his father does not discipline? But if you are without discipline, of which all have become partakers, then you are illegitimate children and not sons. Furthermore, we had earthly fathers to discipline us, and we respected them shall we not much rather be subject to the Father of spirits, and live? For they disciplined us for a short time as seemed best to them, but He disciplines us for our good, so that we may share His holiness. All discipline for the moment seems not to be joyful, but sorrowful; yet to those who have been trained by it, afterwards it yields the peaceful fruit of righteousness. Therefore, strengthen the hands that are weak and the knees that are feeble, and make straight paths for your feet, so that the limb which is lame may not be put out of joint, but rather be healed. (Hebrews 12:4-12)

How long, O Lord? Will You forget me forever? How long will You hide Your face from me? How long shall I take counsel in my soul, having sorrow in my heart all the day? How long will my enemy be exalted over me? Consider and answer me, O Lord my God; enlighten my eyes, or I will sleep the sleep of death, and my enemy will say, “I have overcome him,” and my adversaries will rejoice when I am shaken. (Psalm 13:1-3)

Do you not know? Have you not heard? Has it not been declared to you from the beginning? Have you not understood from the foundations of the earth? It is He who sits above the circle of the earth, and its inhabitants are like grasshoppers, who stretches out the heavens like a curtain and spreads them out like a tent to dwell in. He it is who reduces rulers to nothing, who makes the judges of the earth meaningless. Scarcely have they have been planted, scarcely have they been sown, scarcely has their stock taken root in the earth, but He merely blows on them, and they wither, and the storm carries them away like stubble. “To whom then will you liken Me that I would be his equal?” says the Holy One. Lift up your eyes on high and see who has created these stars, the One who leads forth their host by number, He calls them all by name; because of the greatness of His might and the strength of His power, not one of them is missing. Why do you say, O Jacob, and assert, O Israel, “My way is hidden from the Lord, and the justice due me escapes the notice of my God”? Do you not know? Have you not heard? The Everlasting God, the Lord, the Creator of the ends of the earth does not become weary or tired. His understanding is inscrutable. He gives strength to the weary, and to him who lacks might He increases power. Though youths grow weary and tired, and vigorous young men stumble badly, yet those who wait for the Lord will gain new strength; they will mount up with wings like eagles, they will run and not get tired, they will walk and not become weary. (Isaiah 40:21-31)

God, after He spoke long ago to the fathers in the prophets in many portions and in many ways, in these last days has spoken to us in His Son, whom He appointed heir of all things, through whom also He made the world. And He is the radiance of His glory and the exact representation of His nature, and upholds all things by the word of His power. (Hebrews 1:1-3)

For this reason we must pay much closer attention to what we have heard, so that we do not drift away from it. For if the word spoken through angels proved unalterable, and every transgression and disobedience received a just penalty, how will we escape if we neglect so great a salvation? (Hebrews 2:1-3)

Therefore, holy brethren, partakers of a heavenly calling, consider Jesus, the Apostle and High Priest of our confession. (Hebrews 3:1)

God is love, and the one who abides in love abides in God, and God abides in him. By this, love is perfected with us, so that we may have confidence in the day of judgement because as He is, so also are we in this world. There is no fear in love; but perfect love casts out fear, because fear involves punishment, and the one who fears is not perfected in love. (1 John 4:16-18)

But God demonstrates His own love toward us, in that while we were yet sinners, Christ died for us. Much more then, having now been justified by His blood, we shall be saved from the wrath of God through Him. For if while we were enemies we were reconciled to God through the death of His Son, much more, having been reconciled, we shall be saved by His life. (Romans 5:8-11)

Oh, the depth of the riches both of the wisdom and knowledge of God! How unsearchable are His judgements and unfathomable His ways! For who has known the mind of the Lord, or who became His counsellor? Or who has first given to Him that it might be paid back to Him again? For from Him and through Him and to Him are all things. To Him be the glory forever. Amen. Therefore I urge you, brethren, by the mercies of God, to present your bodies a living and holy sacrifice, acceptable to God, which is your spiritual service of worship. And do not be conformed to this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind, so that you may prove what the will of God is that which is good and acceptable and perfect. (Romans 11:33-12:2)

See, I have set before you today life and prosperity, and death and adversity; in that I command you today to love the Lord your God, to walk in His ways and to keep His commandments and His statutes and His judgements, that you may live and multiply, and that the Lord your God may bless you in the land where you are entering to possess it. But if your heart turns away and you will not obey, but are drawn away and worship other gods and serve them, I declare to you today that you shall surely perish. You will not prolong your days in the land where you are crossing the Jordan to enter and possess it. I call heaven and earth to witness against you today, that I have set before you life and death, the blessing and the curse. So choose life in order that you may live, you and your descendants, by loving the Lord your God, by obeying His voice, and by holding fast to Him; for this is your life and the length of your days, that you may live in the land which the Lord swore to your fathers, to Abraham, Isaac, and Jacob, to give them. (Deuteronomy 30:15-20)

When my heart was embittered and I was pierced within, then I was senseless and ignorant I was like a beast before You. Nevertheless I am continually with You; You have taken hold of my right hand. With Your counsel You will guide me, and afterward receive me to glory. Whom have I in heaven but You? And besides You, I desire nothing on earth. My flesh and my heart may fail, but God is the strength of my heart and my portion forever. For, behold, those who are far from You will perish; You have destroyed all those who are unfaithful to You. But as for me, the nearness of God is my good; I have made the Lord God my refuge, that I may tell of all Your works. (Psalm 73:21-28)

But whatever things were gain to me, those things I have counted as loss for the sake of Christ, More than that, I count all things to be loss in view of the surpassing value of knowing Christ Jesus my Lord, for whom I have suffered the loss of all things, and count them but rubbish so that I may gain Christ. (Philippians 3:7-11)

And He has said to me, “My grace is sufficient for you, for power is perfected in weakness.” Most gladly, therefore, I will rather boast about my weaknesses, so that the power of Christ may dwell in me. Therefore I am well content with weaknesses, with insults, with distresses, with persecutions, with difficulties, for Christ’s sake; for when I am weak, then I am strong. (2 Corinthians 12:9, 10)

But we have this treasure in earthen vessels, so that the surpassing greatness of the power will be of God and not from ourselves; we are afflicted in every way, but not crushed; perplexed, but not despairing persecuted, but not forsaken; struck down, but not destroyed; always carrying about in the body of the dying of Jesus, so that the life of Jesus also may be manifested in our body. (2 Corinthian 4:7-10)

I have been crucified with Christ and it is no longer I who live, but Christ lives in me; and the life which I now live in the flesh I live by faith in the Son of God, who loved me and gave Himself up for me. (Galatians 2:20)

To whom God willed to make known what is the riches of the glory of this mystery among the Gentiles, which is Christ in you, the hope of glory. (Colossians 1:27)

For this reason I bow my knees before the Father, from whom every family in heaven and on earth derives its name, that He would grant you, according to the riches of His glory, to be strengthened with power through His Spirit in the inner man, so that Christ may dwell in your hearts through faith; and that you, being rooted and grounded in love, may be able to comprehend with all the saints what is the breadth and length and height and depth, and to know the love of Christ which surpasses knowledge, that you may be filled up to all the fullness of God. Now to Him who is able to do far more abundantly beyond all that we ask or think, according to the power that works within us, to Him be the glory in the church and in Christ Jesus to all generations forever and ever. Amen. (Ephesians 3:14-21)

I wrote this Seattle Assignment after our LTS Fieldtrip to Seattle, Washington. There, while staying at Bethany Community Church, we had classes by Richard Dahlstrom about things certain aspects of living in the world today. In many ways, it was like the “Dating the World” classes that we had with Lawrence. But in this instance, we also had immediate opportunity to put what we learned in class to practice as we went on to do various activities around the city of Seattle.

I can’t say that Seattle was my favourite LTS Fieldtrip… I really don’t have a favourite. But it deffinately has had the most impact on me, just with regards to the the circumstance that I am in now, living in the culture that I am in: the post-modernistic, “academic”, liberalism of University life in Toronto. In fact, during the field trip, I was on the perfect street-evangelism mission to prepare me for University – with Kristine Brown at University of Washington.

In classes, we learned to accept our world for what it is, and to settle in, and not to disengage – only when we do so would we be truly effective. It is again, being “in” the world, yet not “of” the world. Kristine helped me really see this, saying to me during our time at “U-Dub” that everyone we saw as we walked around campus seemed to be walking around with so much purpose.. they had to get to class.. they had to get somewhere. Yet we, while walking around with no “purpose” at all, really were the ones with the only true purpose, bearing the testimony of Christ. She pointed out to me how disconnected those people were, how lonely they must be.

The temptation there is to do just the same. To disengage from them, safe in the knowledge that I have hope in the truth. But is that even what having hope in the truth means? My calling is not to just have hope, but to also be hope. I am Christ’s ambassador for reconciliation to the world.

Anyway, I’ve said enough already…

Seattle Assignment
Lecturer: Richard Dahlstrom
By Chris Evangelista, February 24, 2005

In a world that has increasingly become meaningless, we are called to have meaning. This world, and the culture it has adopted expresses diversity, though in the midst of anonymity; connectability, while remaining lonely. The world professes an attitude of apathy and selfishness, which altogether eventually lead to hopelessness. Within this, we are called to be the hope that is missing. We are called to be a testimony of the joy for which they are longing. In John 17:15, Jesus specifically asks God not to take us out of the world, but rather to protect us from the evil one. The reason for this is found a few verses earlier in John 17:13 where Jesus prays, “and these things I speak in the world so that they may have My joy made full in themselves.” The meaning of life is this, that we may be an outpouring of love and joy, so that people may see the hope which is found in Jesus Christ.

God is calling us to live a godly life in Babylon – that is, the culture we are living in, by being faithful in the little things. As it says in Zacheriah 4:10, “for who has despised the day of small things?” In Jeremiah 29, God is addressing the false teaching that some prophets were falsely teaching to the Israelites living in exile. They were being taught not to settle into Babylon because they were going to be restored back to the Promised Land within a few years. Correcting this, God instructs the Israelites to settle down and live out their lives. In verse 6, God says, “take wives and become the fathers of sons and daughters; and multiply there and do not decrease.” God is telling them to stop being anxious about the future and disengage from the present, but to prepare themselves for a lifetime in exile – they will have sons and daughters who themselves would have sons and daughters before they return to the Promised Land. We, in the same way, are being called to settle down on earth, and in our present circumstance so that we may live for the joy found in every “today.” And then on top of this in verse 7, it says that we should also concern ourselves of the welfare of the world and to pray for it. We are not only called to settle down, but also to become involved. We are not just called to not disengage, but also to engage ourselves and concern ourselves with the concerns of the world.

The three main things that I have observed people striving for are all pretty much connected: youth and beauty, wealth, and companionship. It seems like youth and beauty is being sold through different means that lead to a “bettering” of one’s body. There are many ads that promote healthy living and fitness, which are good things. But the image or message that is being sold is that fitness gives way to beauty just as much as a liposuction or other plastic surgery does. Other ads sell products that provide a status symbol of shows of wealth. This is seen in material possessions. Finally, there is seen a seeking after companionship and intimacy in ads that sell opportunities for people to meet or date. Some range from simple phone calls or encounters, while some advertise relationships, even marriage, or just sex.

What people truly want – and even need some times – in the end is to be satisfied. They want to be satisfied physically, emotionally, and spiritually. They want to be recognized and loved. They want to be satisfied by a purposeful life. These things that people seek after, youth and beauty, wealth and companionship lead to what gives their lives purpose and meaning. And so, this is what God provides for them and us. For coming out of the meaning that God gives to our lives, is the satisfaction that He provides for our every need. It says in Philippians 4:19, “and my God will supply all your needs according to His riches in glory in Christ Jesus.”

He gives our lives meaning. He purposes for us to be the testimony of His glory. He is seeking to show His deity through our humanity. We are to do this by simply submitting our lives to Him.

This prayer assignment was for the second book that we read in my LTS year at Capernwray – Daring to Draw Near, by John White. I think this journal is another one of those that kind of, went over my head, that is until now. Again, I can tell that I rushed it at the time, yet I am so amazed that God would still use this to remind me of His faithfulness…

Right at the very beginning, I wrote this: “This is how God seeks for us to respond to His invitation. That we would in turn seek fellowship and relationship with Him.” That’s what prayer is! Excuse me while I go work on this relationship that I so often neglect…

Prayer – Daring to Draw Near
Lecturers: Charlie and Marlene Fordham
By Chris Evangelista, March 7, 2005

God initiates. We respond. And when we respond in humility and truth, realizing God’s rightful authority over us, that is worship. This same principle is true of prayer. It is merely a response to His initiation. It is God who seeks after us. We respond to Him. We must be careful not to confuse a familiarity we may have with God or with the Bible with true intimacy with Him. Intimacy requires relationship and fellowship. And this is how God seeks for us to respond to His invitation. That we would in turn seek fellowship and relationship with Him. This is reflected in the tone, content or even frequency of our prayer. But mostly, it is reflected in our attitude of humility as we dare to draw near to our God.

In Chapter 1, God grows bigger in the sight of Abraham. In his “negotiations” with God, Abraham comes to an assuring realization of who God is: “the image of God was changing in Abraham’s eyes. It was no monster that faced him but the familiar God of the covenant. Yet somehow God was larger… a righteous God whose judgements were past finding out.” In Chapter 2, God brings Jacob to a clinging dependency on Him. God initiates a battle with Jacob to bring him to the place that Jacob already had with God, as a blessed man promised to greatness. But God wanted first to allow Jacob to come to Him in dependence. God broke Jacob, causing him to cling to God. Yet in his brokenness, Jacob had victory, for “Jacob had conquered by his helpless dependency.” This dependency was what God was looking for in order to fulfill His promise.

In Chapter 3, we see how God is seeking for us to have fellowship with Him in the example of Moses’ longing to see God’s glory. This is ultimately what God is wanting to declare, His glory, and it is also what God wants us to seek, that we see His glory working in our lives. The side effect of us seeing His glory is that we would reflect it. For Moses, His face literally shone – it shone so much that the people were afraid and he had to wear a veil. This happened every time he went to fellowship with God. This is what true fellowship with God brings. The result is that we would reflect His Glory.

God initiates prayer in many different ways. In Chapter 2, we saw how God physically touched Jacob in order to bring him to repentance and the blessing that God had. In Chapter 4, we see God using David’s sin to bring him closer to Himself by allowing their fellowship to be restored after David truly repents. In Chapter 6, we see how God uses the circumstances in our lives to bring us to Him… We see Hannah’s desperation leading her ever closer to God. And finally, in Chapter 9, we see how the truths about Jesus Christ becomes the fuel that ignites Paul’s prayer for the Ephesian Church. It is the revelation of Christ’s indwelling, saving life that Paul uses to inspire himself. In fact it seems as though he gets sidetracked in his prayer by proclaiming these truths, though it leads to this wonderful hope about Him who is able to do far more abundantly than we can ask or imagine…

Whom have I in heaven but You?
And beside you, I desire nothing on earth.
My flesh and my heart may fail,
But God is the strength of my heart and my portion forever.
For behold, those who are far from you will perish;
You have destroyed all those who are unfaithful to You.
But as for me, the nearness of God is my good.
I have made the Lord God my refuge,
That I may tell of all Your works.
- Psalm 74:25-28

Lord Jesus, help me to continually realize that You are the only One that will ever be enough for me. You satisfy me, Lord, You are what I want and what I need. Even in my unfaithfulness, You remain ever faithful. In my sin, You are merciful. I fail so often, Lord, but you provide the strength I need to get through. Even though I choose not to rely on You, You’re always calling me back to You. Help me realize that close fellowship with You is for my good and Your glory. You will be my refuge. You will be the strength of my weaknesses. And in all that, I can proclaim only You as the One who deserves all the glory, praise, and honour, because only You, Lord deserve these things.

Amen.

The Year-End Assignment was the final assignment my Leadership Training class at Capernwray Harbour had. It was to be a summary of the entire year that we had just spent training, and in leadership, at Capernwray. We had a lot of class time to do it. And for good reason. We needed to go through all of our other writings and assignments, of course to remind us of the things that God had been teaching us throughout that time.

Year-End Assignment
Chris Evangelista
May 2005

The theme verse that I chose for this year is from 2 Corinthians 12:9 & 10: “And He said to me, ‘My grace is sufficient for you, for power is perfected in weakness.’ Most gladly therefore, I will rather boast about my weaknesses so that the power of Christ may dwell in me. Therefore I am well content with weaknesses, with insults, with distresses, with persecutions, with difficulties, for Christ’s sake; for when I am weak, then I am strong.” This verse is the underlying principle in everything that I have learned this year. Through our assignments and classes; through community life, study projects and seminars; through our field trips and special events; through our role as leaders; through the calling to which we have been called, Christ’s sufficiency is a lesson that I have learned and am learning, and I am confident that it is something that I will continue to learn through Christ’s revelation in my life.

In the book of Hebrews, I learned to consider Jesus in all of my situations. In Chapter 1 verse 2, it says, “in these last days [He] has spoken to us in His Son, whom He appointed heir of all things, through whom also He made the world. And He is the radiance of His glory and the exact representation of His nature, and upholds all things by the word of His power.” After the Law and the Prophets, God has been proclaiming His message to us in Christ. He is the final message of salvation, and so, I should pay close attention to Him. In Chapter 2, verse 1 and 3, it says, “For this reason we must pay much closer attention to what we have heard, so that we do not drift away from it… [for] how will we escape if we neglect so great a salvation?” So in light of God’s truths and revelation to me, I should consider Him, although not just when times are bad or when I am in need, but in all things and all circumstances. What this leads to is rest, which is not inaction, but merely a change of activity, from relying on myself – again, in the bad and the good – to relying on Christ. Chapter 4, verse 10 and 11 says, “for the one who has entered His rest has himself also rested from his works, as God did from His. Therefore let us be diligent to enter that rest, so that no one will fall, through following the same example of disobedience.”

Considering Jesus is important, because in Romans, I learned that I have nothing in and of myself to ever please God. It says in Romans 2:3, “But do you suppose this, O man, when you pass judgement on those who practice such things and do the same yourself, that you will escape the judgement of God? Or do you think lightly of the riches of His kindness and tolerance and patience, not knowing that the kindness of God leads you to repentance?” I still need Jesus. I will continue to need Him for as long as the flesh is in me. In chapter 7, verse 24, Paul writes, “wretched man that I am! Who will set me free from the body of this death?” Christ’s life: His message of righteousness, leads me to realize my deficiencies in light of His abilities. He is the only one righteous who can make me acceptable to a Holy God. In Romans 8 verse 1-3, it says “therefore there is now no condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus. For the law of the Spirit of life in Christ Jesus has set you free from the law of sin and of death. For what the Law could not do, weak as it was through the flesh, God did: sending His own Son in the likeness of sinful flesh and as an offering for sin, He condemned sin in the flesh.” So there is hope in Jesus! In fact, our only hope is in Jesus. In Hebrews 12, verse 1 – 3, it says “Therefore, since we have so great a cloud of witnesses surrounding us, let us also lay aside every encumbrance and the sin which so easily entangles us, and let us run with endurance the race that is set before us, fixing our eyes on Jesus, the author and perfector of faith, who for the joy set before Him has sat down at the right hand of the throne of God. For consider Him who has endured such hostility by sinners against Himself, so that you will not grow weary and lose heart.”

Considering Jesus leads me to learning how to set priorities. One of the areas where God was revealing Himself to me is in my school work. Though I once thought of myself as a good worker, I realized that what I was able to produce was not the only thing that was important. It wasn’t that I did not get the work done in time, but rather, I chose to delay and procrastinate, until I had not other choice than to complete the task. 2 Timothy 2:4 is a verse that addresses this. It speaks of a soldier in active service who does not entangle himself in the affairs of everyday life, for while the affairs of everyday life may not be wrong, it just is not a part of active service. And what we are called to is that active service, to which we must wholly devote ourselves to. It is about learning to do the right thing at the right time: a priority set for my activities.

Another area I learned to set priority is in my relationships with others. I found this in learning what true friendship is. Jesus tells us clearly what the priority must be. We get a picture of what friendship means to Jesus in two verses. In John 15:14, Jesus says, “You are My friends if you obey My commandments.” And in John 14:15, He says, “If you love Me, you will keep My commandments.” What He is saying is that Friendship to Him and Loving Him both mean that we obey His commandments. This leads us to the principle that our friendship to Him is the same as our love for Him. Our priority then in friendship is this Love that we should have for one another. In John 5:13, Jesus explains what this love is to be, “greater love has no one than this, that one lay down his life for his friends.” Our priority in friendship, and in our relationships is a sacrificial love. A love is seen in our preference of another, as it says in Romans 12:9-13, “Let love be without hypocrisy. Abhor what is evil; cling to what is good. Be devoted to one another in brotherly love; give preference to one another in honour; not lagging behind in diligence, fervent in spirit, serving the Lord; rejoicing in hope, persevering in tribulation, devoted to prayer, contributing to the needs of the saints, practicing hospitality.”

So what that this sacrificial love mean? A love that is devoted to one another demands a cost to oneself. Although, in fact, it is not cost but, when in it is done in generosity – that is giving in an attitude of faith and trust in God – it is an investment in other people’s lives. Concerning the Sabbath year and the year of Jubilee, God instructs the Israelites to be generous in their giving, which is in accordance to how He has blessed them; to completely forgive each other’s debts; and to be sure that there are no one poor in the land. This generosity is a practical way of looking at sacrificial love: preferring others. But the wonderful thing is that in this, God does not ask the Israelites to blindly and foolishly give away all of their possessions. Though He demands a liberal generosity, He has a plan to provide for those who are going to choose to be obedient, and be trusting. Imagine the bumper crop of those who plan to trust in God to stop sowing and reaping, and give their land rest. Imagine the sustenance for those who plan to trust in God to forgive all the debt against them, and those who plan to release their slaves with a liberal portion of their belongings. God gives in abundance to those who will choose to yield to His work in them. In 2 Timothy 2:6, it says, “the hard-working farmer ought to be the first to receive his share of the crops.” And in Galatians 6:7-8, it says, “Do not be deceived, God is not mocked; for whatever a man sows, this he will also reap. For the one who sows to his own flesh will from the flesh reap corruption, but the one who sows to the Spirit will from the Spirit reap eternal life.” We will reap what we sow: good, or evil; want, or abundance.

God’s grace in my life is a distinct and noticeable difference to others. In Genesis 1:27, our purpose in life is stated, and that is that we are to be in His image. But our flesh has corrupted this, and so, as I realized in Romans, I need Christ to restore me back to my original purpose in Life. What I must have then, is that distinct identity of being a witness for Christ. In Jeremiah 29, God, through Jeremiah, is addressing the Israelites, and is instructing them regarding their captivity in Babylon. As the Israelites were in Babylon, aliens, so also are we in this world. But God has placed us here and called us to be His witnesses. So, in verses 5 to 7 says, “build houses and live in them; and plant gardens and eat their produce. Take wives and become the fathers of sons and daughters, and take wives for your sons and give your daughters to husbands, that they may bear sons and daughters and multiply there and do not decrease. Seek the welfare of the city where I have sent you into exile, and pray to the Lord on its behalf for in its welfare you will have welfare.” Jeremiah tells them to settle down. This is indication that I should not be continuously looking towards what is in heaven, and thus be belligerent or even apathetic towards this world. I should be prepared to live here until He calls me back home. He then teaches that I should go beyond and even seek the welfare of the world.

The line to be drawn, however, is in learning not to love the world. It says in James 4:4, “you adulteresses, do you not know that friendship with the world is hostility toward God? Therefore, whoever wishes to be a friend of the world makes himself an enemy of God.” I realize that while I am to settle down in the world, and to seek its welfare, that I should not be serving the world. This worldly attitude is not found in specific actions, but in an attitude and acceptance of the “spirit of the age.” As I said before I need to be distinct, because the culture I live in should not be defining the Life of Christ in me. For this, Jesus left the resources, so that I can be His light. Jesus says in John 18:14-5 that He has left us with God’s word, and that He has asked God to protect us from the evil one, for we are not of this world, as Christ was not. Therefore, we will be sanctified, used for our purpose of being the Image of God, in His truth. All of this is expressed in His joy being made complete in us. Joy is not an emotion, it is not a feeling, but rather an expression of gratitude in all circumstances. God’s grace allows this, as He allowed it with Job, who was able to say, even in the his lowest moment, “the Lord has given and the Lord has taken away. Blessed be the name of the Lord.”

Christ is more than enough for me! That’s His sufficiency. He is more than enough to conquer my worries and fears. It says in 1 Peter 5:6-7, “therefore, humble yourselves under the mighty hand of God, that He may exalt you at the proper time, casting all your anxieties on Him, because He cares for you.” I learned that worry is no match for our Lord. He is my salvation in times of need (Exodus 14:13), He is my courage in times of fear (Isaiah 35:4), He is my consolation when anxious thoughts multiply within me (Psalms 94:19), and He is the perfect love who abides in me and casts out all fear (1 John 4:18). This is amplified in practicality as the rigors of life sometimes seem to be too much to handle. A clear example of this is just during the past two weeks when I was sick with the flu. With all the activities going on to be worried about – seminars, study projects and youth retreat prep, I have no choice but to conclude that Christ’s sufficiency was working in me, to handle my fears and anxiety, but more than that, in my weakness, to show His strength at work. Though terribly ill, I was able to lead that seminar, complete my study project meetings and my prep work for youth retreat. But again, it wasn’t me, but Christ in me. Christ who sustained me. Christ who was enough for me.

So His grace, which is sufficient for me, reminds me to consider Him in all circumstance – for if I consider Him, and I will enter rest; calls me to set my priorities on Him – for what I sow I will reap; and completes me in His joy, for that is the distinction made in me as His witness in this world. Oh the depth of the riches both of the wisdom and knowledge of God! How unsearchable are His judgements and unfathomable His ways! For who has known the mind of the Lord, or who became His counsellor? Or who has first given to Him that it might be paid back to him again: For from Him and through Him and to Him are all things. To Him be the glory forever. Amen. Therefore I urge you, brethren, by the mercies of God, to present your bodies a living an holy sacrifice, acceptable to God, which is your spiritual service of worship. I will, Lord. I leave all me to do as You please. I have been crucified with Christ; and it is no longer I who live, but Christ lives in me; and the life which I now live in the flesh I live by faith in the Son of God, who loved me and gave Himself up for me. Amen.

The Spiritual Secret of Hudson Taylor, by Dr. & Mrs. Howard Taylor, was the first of the two book reviews that I had to do in my LTS Year at Capernwray. Because it was done at the beginning of the year, I can’t help but think of how it really influenced that year, even though I did not notice it at the time. Hudson Taylor’s story is one of such sufficiency in Christ, just as was my struggle at the time. And I guess it was good to see that someone else has gone through what I was going through.

I love this one part of the book so much, that even though I talked about it in the essay, I would still like to repeat it. It is the part when Hudson Taylor, while separated from his family, was writing his children, preaching Christ to them… “You do not know how often Papa thinks of his darlings and how often he looks at your photographs until tears fill his eyes. Sometimes he almost fears lest he should feel discontented when he thinks of how far away you are from him; but, then, dear Jesus, who never leaves him, says: ‘Do not be afraid. I will keep your heart satisfied…’ I wish you, my precious children, knew what it was to give your hearts to Jesus to keep everyday. I used to try to keep my own heart right, but it would be always going wrong; and so at last I had to give up trying myself, and accept Jesus’ offer to keep it for me… Once I used to try to think very much and very often about Jesus, but I often forgot Him; now I trust Jesus to keep my heart remembering Him, and He does so.”

Sometimes for me, I feel like things really need to be brought down to that level. To know in just the simplest of ways that God is the one who who satisfies me. How wonderful it is to have a friend like Jesus, who “keep’s my heart satisfied.” Praise the Lord.

The Spiritual Secret of Hudson Taylor
Chris Evangelista
October 8, 2004

The Spiritual Secret of Hudson Taylor is in his complete and utter dependence on Jesus Christ. More than this, though, He also learned how to be satisfied in the situations of his life: drawing the satisfaction from the only One who can give it. Where he is was right, but the means by which he was practicing faith caused much hardship. God was faithful: this was evident when he was preparing to leave for China. But it wasn’t until later on in life did Hudson Taylor realize the source of even the faith that he longed for: “As gradually the light was dawning on me, I saw that faith was the only prerequisite, was the hand to lay hold on His fullness and make it my own. But I had not this faith. I strove for it, but it would not come; tried to exercise it, but in vain” (Page 260-261).

Hudson Taylor knew that it was by faith that Christ would do through him. But even faith became an obstacle for him. It was an enemy too strong to be overcome. He saw “more and more the wondrous supply of grace laid up in Jesus.” But in this, his helplessness only increased. He “prayed for faith, but it came not” (261). The source of the faith he wanted was yet to be revealed to him: “‘But how to get faith strengthened? Not by striving after faith, but by resting on the Faithful One.’ As I read I saw it all! ‘If we believe not… he abideth faithful’ (2 Tim 2:13). I looked to Jesus and saw (and when I saw, oh how joy flowed!). ‘Ah, there is rest!’ I thought. ‘I have striven in vain to rest in Him, I’ll strive no more. For has He not promised to abide with me – never to leave me, never to fail me?’ And dearie, He never will!” (261). He has realized rest in Christ! He has now found the One who will “work in you, both to will and to work for His good pleasure” (Philippians 2:13).

This revelation immediately began to transform Hudson Taylor’s life. It also came just in time as soon after, he would find a crisis in his life that would otherwise have been ahrd to bear. He would loose another child and later, he would loose his wife as well. But God would sustain – and satisfy him. He wrote, nnot long after, “my thursty days are all past” (273). This was because Christ would remain faithful: “If ever the reality of the power of Christ to meet the heart’s deepest need was put to the test of experience, it was in this life, swept clean of all that had been its earthly comfort – wife, children, home, health to a large extent – and left amid the responsibility of such a mission and such a crisis, far away in China” (273). Hudson Taylor believed in the comfort Christ could bring. He then was able to feel it. Even in such a sorrowful time, he was able to write: “My heart is overwhelmed with gratitude and praise. My eyes flow with tears of mingled joy and sorrow… My tears are more tears of joy that sorrow. But most of all, I joy in God through our Lord Jesus Christ” (274). Who else could say such things in such circumstances, but a man filled with the fullness – the satisfaction of Jesus Christ.

Hudson Taylor again shows this rest, and even preaches it to his children, at a time when he felt lonely. In longing to be with his children, he continues to point them back to Christ: “I wish you, my precious children, knew what it was to give your hearts to Jesus to keep everyday. I used to try to keep my own heart right, but it would be always going wrong; and so at last I had to give up trying myself, and accept Jesus’ offer to keep it for me… Once I used to try to think very much and very often about Jesus, but I often forgot Him; now I trust Jesus to keep my heart remembering Him, and He does so” (279). In simple words, Hudson Taylor expressed what, in heartache and in senseless striving, God had revealed to him. In this difficult time, Christ remained the same: “No language can express what He has been and is to me. Never does He leave me, constantly does He cheer me with His love” (281).

Finally, we see this rest as Hudson Taylor was himself suffering physically, from a concussion of the spine caused by a bad fall. “Then came the gradual paralysis of the lower limbs, and the doctor’s verdict that consigned him to absolute rest in bed” (312). How true is that statement? The doctor probably did not know that Hudson Taylor was already doing much “resting.” But this seemed to limit him as “a little bed with four post was his prison” (313). Though even confined, Jesus Christ would remain faithful, not only to Hudson Taylor, but to CIM, “And round about him day and night was the presence to which he had fullest access in the name of Jesus” (313).

Hudson Taylor became available to the Lord, and allowed Him to work through him. This was the anthem of his life. Even at his lowest moments, he was satisfied because Jesus was his satisfaction. Not his own strength. He realized the true meaning of rest: “One of the happiest periods of my life was that period of forced inactivity, when one could do nothing but ‘rest in the Lord, and wait patiently for Him’ (Psalm 37:7) AND SEE Him meeting all one’s need” (315). Hudson Taylor realized that true rest meant stopping his own activity to allow God to begin His. “Cease striving and know that I am God” (Psalm 46;10). And the result of this is that He will “do far more abundantly beyond all that we ask or think, according to the power that works within us” (Ephesians 3:20). Why? So that “to Him be the glory in the church and in Christ Jesus to all generation forever and ever” (Ephesians 3:21). Amen.